• Fresh Views

    Be REAL Series: A is for ACCEPTANCE

    Duke Kahanamoku statue at Duke’s restaurant, La Jolla, CA

    When there is Aloha in your heart, nothing is insurmountable.

    ~ Yoshio

    Today’s word in our Be REAL series  is Acceptance!

    When we started our series on solution-focused words back in 2020, Acceptance was our first post in the series. We believed, and still do, that acceptance is the key underpinning of everything in healthcare and in life. We wrote about both self-acceptance as well as healthcare professional (HCP) acceptance of what people living with diabetes are able to do. We all have different capacities and priorities, and we might not agree on what these are. Our role as an HCP is to understand and support people sharing their experiences with us and help them to live in acceptance of the decisions they make. Our goal is to support and not enforce.

    Why did we start our blog with an image of Duke Kahanamoku?  He was known as the Ambassador of Aloha. An Olympic swimmer and surfer from Hawaii who spread the spirit of Aloha and the acceptance that Aloha brings. Aloha means welcome, but also means love, peace, compassion and  fellowship. What a great way to embody acceptance?

    In today’s crazy world, acceptance can mean so many things. So we’d like to use Aloha as a simple way to think about how we accept ourselves and each other.

    In our original blog series we suggested weekly “challenges” to our readers.  Here we revisit our challenge from 2020 and add how we can position acceptance along with the spirit of Aloha.

    Here are 5 solution-focused questions you can incorporate to focus on building acceptance:

    1. Could  you tell me about your strengths and qualities you are happy about?
    2. What is one thing you have come to accept in your life that took some time to process?
    3. How did you feel when you were finally able to accept that challenging situation?
    4. How could you use those experiences and feelings to move you forward to accept a new challenge now?
    5. How can I help you come to realize acceptance in your life?

    As an additional challenge, we encourage you to accept the spirit of Aloha as you engage in your daily life,at work and at home, with people you know and with those you don’t. Be an example of accepting differences in the world with love, peace, compassion and fellowship.

    Join us next week as we focus on the L in Be REAL: Listening!

    We welcome anyone interested in our approach to Subscribe to our blog and we’ll email you when a new post is published!

    If you are a health care professional and interested in learning more about our solution-focused practice and approach, when you subscribe to our blog, we’ll send you in return a FREE resource of 10 Solution-Focused Questions to start a solution-focused discussion with your clients. 

    Follow us on Twitter @AFreshPOVforYou

    Deb is employed by Dexcom, but her words and opinions in this blog are her own.

    Tami is employed by the University of Kentucky HealthCare Barnstable Brown Diabetes Center, but her words and opinions in this blog are her own.

  • Fresh Views

    Perspective over comparison

    No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. – Eleanor Roosevelt

    The trees in Kentucky are bringing their showy fall foliage. Each does not think about competing with the tree beside it. They just do their thing and bring their color.

    Our last post focused on the impactful words that Tami keeps on a post-it note stuck to her computer monitor: Progress, not perfection. These words build on how the growth mindset draws attention to one’s own progress. Today we turn our attention to 3 more impactful words shared by a mentor over the years: Perspective over comparison.

    Accepting oneself can be hard! 

    In life it can be easy to default to comparing yourself to others. Just last week Tami heard these words from a patient, “I’m bad…I don’t eat the way I’m supposed to. I don’t keep my blood sugars as well controlled as my friend who also has diabetes.”  It’s so easy to get caught up in creating our own opinions of ourselves and how we measure up to others. We can play the comparison game all day long but how helpful is that really? Comparison can leave us feeling down. 

    Being realistic about personal strengths and challenges is often easier said than done. Striving to be honest with ourselves and accept who we are, our abilities, and acknowledge when we’ve reached our limits is the goal. Without acceptance it’s impossible to move forward. In a 2018 #DSMA Twitter Chat we asked participants about their strengths. One individual with diabetes replied:

    “I am strong when it comes to seeking support. When I am down, I am self-aware enough to address my hardship. I’m not afraid to be vulnerable.”

    Another replied:

    “My strength is that I refuse to give up. I am tenacious and do not take no for an answer.”

    Acceptance is critical when living with a chronic condition like diabetes

    When encountering clients/patients facing this comparison scenario, diabetes care and education specialists (DCES) can step alongside as a think partner and give perspective to the circumstances. We can offer caring, support and encouragement.

    People need to feel safe when engaging with their care team to acknowledge what they can do, along with what is challenging for them. This past week in an educational symposium for people with diabetes that Tami spoke at, the participants voiced loud and clear the theme of feeling judgment from their healthcare providers. DCES have a unique opportunity to support those that live with diabetes as they learn to accept changes and new challenges in dealing with diabetes. And, practice acceptance, understanding that people react to challenges differently. It’s critical to accept the person in front of you as they are, without judgment.

    An individual typically can recognize and clearly identify things they are able to do or achieve and feel happy. We can then encourage focus on those strengths, do more of what is working, and leverage those strengths, skills and qualities to create new opportunities. 

    In the same Twitter Chat mentioned above, another participant shared:

    “I concentrate on the lifestyle. The day to day life of a person with diabetes. I work for overall health through exercise, and diet for BGL [blood glucose] results. The support I receive takes care of the rest. So, cure or not, let’s make it as good as we can and support the other.”

    Diabetes care and education specialists can learn a lot from simply asking people what strengths they have to help them live well with diabetes, keeping top of mind, it’s all about perspective over comparison.

    Here are 6 solution-focused questions you can incorporate to focus on perspective, strengths, and self-acceptance:

    1. What would success look like for you (e.g. in life, in living with diabetes etc)?
    2. What strengths do you have and use to help you manage your diabetes every day? 
    3. How can you use your strengths to create opportunities for success?
    4. What is one thing you have come to accept in your life that took some time to process?
    5. How did you feel when you were finally able to accept that challenging situation?
    6. How could you use those experiences and feelings to move you forward to accept a new challenge now?

    If you are a health care professional and interested in learning more about our solution-focused practice and approach, when you subscribe to our blog, we’ll send you in return a FREE resource of 10 Solution-Focused Questions to start a solution-focused discussion with your clients. 

    Follow us on Twitter @AFreshPOVforYou

    Deb is employed by Dexcom, but her words and opinions in this blog are her own.

    Tami is employed by the University of Kentucky HealthCare Barnstable Brown Diabetes Center, but her words and opinions in this blog are her own.

  • Fresh Views

    Top 10 Things 2020 Taught Us

    We were happy to see the sun set on 2020! 

    Life is not about how fast you run or how high you climb, but how well you bounce. – Vivian Komori

    It’s been said that “Life is not about how fast you run or how high you climb, but how well you bounce.” That pretty much sums up 2020! We’ve all learned to “bounce” through the multitude of challenges before us this past year. Yet, through it all there were many positives that we @AFreshPOVforYou personally realized during those unprecedented days. And one of those positives was celebrating the second birthday of this blog!

    WHO ARE WE? 

    If you are new to our blog, we are solution-focused diabetes care and education specialists. We are passionate about doing diabetes care and education differently. Too much of life is spent focusing on problems. Instead, we believe in turning attention to possibilities, opportunities, and a fresh vision for the future. We see the benefit in stepping alongside our clients as “think partners” to focus on what’s important to them, what’s already going well, and build upon that to reach their goals so that they may live life to the fullest. We invite you to join us in doing the same if this is a new paradigm for you. We are advocates for person-centered, strengths-based language, and believe that self-compassion is essential when living with a chronic condition. 

    OUR MISSION

    As we welcome the new year, our Mission continues to be that We guide healthcare professionals in taking a solution-focused approach to practice to enable clients with diabetes to embrace possibilities, opportunities, and a fresh vision for the future.

    Our interest and passion around taking a solution-focused approach to practice (and life), means acknowledging what has gone well, acknowledging how that success was achieved, then identifying how to do more of that and build upon that moving forward.

    TOP 10 THINGS THAT 2020 TAUGHT US (in no particular order)

    1. Importance of connection with others and having support. We don’t take the human touch for granted after living through 2020. We learned that connection and support comes in many different forms. We found creative easy ways to Keep Friends Close, as well as family, through Zoom virtual happy hours, virtual graduations, virtual birthday celebrations; hugs through windows; and drive by celebrations. Find 5 ways to guide your clients to engage in ongoing diabetes support here.
    1. Do hard things early in the day to feel accomplished. We both work the best in the morning. While we’ve known this, it was never quite so clear as it was in 2020. We did the “hard” work early in the day when our minds were freshest, so that we felt accomplished. The stressful days left us tired and spent by days end, and after dinner to help us relax and “escape” we could often be found indulging in Netflix, Prime, and others (who knew you needed so many streaming channels?). We identified a time when things were working well (in the morning) and tried to do more of it. When working with clients, try to identify when they think the clearest and encourage them to focus on their diabetes at that time. Help them identify their “Exceptions”, those times when things are going well. If your client wears a CGM, help them identify a quiet time to retrospectively review their CGM reports to identify patterns and trends and develop 1-2 small behavior changes to move then towards their goals by “doing more of what is working well.”
    1. We CAN be healthy. While many have gained the “COVID 19 pounds”, and may have been over indulging during the past several months, we learned that we could continue to adopt healthy habits, even during a stay at home order. Deb likes and has been focusing on the Mediterranean eating plan that includes lots of healthy fruits and vegetables with less red meat. She also decided to go back to using her WW (formerly Weight Watchers) app to help her track her food, activity and sleep. Tami purchased an under desk elliptical machine to help keep her active during the week, and spent time enjoying great outdoor walking trails on the weekends while social distancing. While in ways it has been challenging being home so much, we learned that it can also be healthy. When eating at home there’s more control over the ingredients added to recipes. There also may be a little more time to prepare meals, or do “meal prep” for the week. Read more tips here.
    1. There are many possibilities, we just have to identify them. With restaurants closed and outside entertainment challenging, we quickly began to think of out of the box possibilities. Deb and her husband decided to have a “car picnic” after they picked up wine at a local winery. From the front seat of their car they could see the peaks of the Sierra Nevada Mountains while enjoying a picnic lunch and a cool glass of Rose. On the work front, taking a solution-focused approach to diabetes care and education can be a fresh new start and bring possibilities to light. Gather some tips from our blog here.
    1. Keep a mindset focused on finding solutions (rather than focusing on problems). We learned that in matters big and small, diabetes-related or not, by embracing a mindset that focuses on solutions, and channeling energy into leveraging strengths and possibilities, we can cultivate a solution-focused mindset. One that envisions success. One which helps manage stress. In our blog you’ll find 7 strategies you can use to step alongside your clients and support them in embracing a solution-focused mindset and managing stress.
    1. Acceptance and gratitude. While social distancing and stay at home orders in 2020 kept us from living out our plans for the year, we eventually came to accept that, and focus on what we could do and find gratitude and happiness in that. Read our tips on developing acceptance as a personal strength and helping cultivate it in others in our blog here, and tips to get started with daily gratitude practice here.
    1. The joy in giving. With life moving at a little slower pace, Tami found joy in giving to others. Small surprise “porch drops” on family and friends’ porches to brighten their day. Dropping by bags of food to be distributed to those in need in the community. She even took up baking bread as surprise drop-offs to those who would enjoy it. With the news coverage of families without food, Deb’s family and her workplace donated to www.feedingamerica.org on multiple occasions to support those in need. Sparking Joy in life and in diabetes education is an important element of our mission.
    1. Active listening is critical. With our daily Zoom meetings and family gatherings we learned that listening is crucial. It can be challenging to not “talk over” people when the virtual conversation includes many individuals. We couldn’t have “side bar” conversations unless they were by text or personal chat. We couldn’t read body language easily. Read more about how listening in a solution-focused practice can support the process of becoming a “think partner” with your clients.
    1. Resilience can be developed. How many virtual conferences or meetings have you attended in 2020? We attended more than we can count, and who knew just how successful they could be! While we missed the ability to be face-to-face with our friends and colleagues, we appreciated the opportunity to continue to learn and conduct business. We just kept going! That is what resilience is all about! Learn how you can build resilience in our blog here.
    1. Power of humor. How could we have survived the past year without humor! Laughing with friends online, reading silly memes on social media, and trying not to take ourselves too seriously. One of our dear colleagues and friends always provides us with comical relief and was no exception in 2020. You can sample our thoughts on humor in our blog here.
    Virtual happy hour laughs!

    2020 was a good teacher! Let’s embrace 2021 with New Year’s “solutions”, rather than “resolutions”

    Our challenge to you as we embark on this new year still facing struggles and uncertainty, is what if, instead of making New Year’s Resolutions this year (which require change and “fixing problems”), you instead guide your clients (and yourself) in making New Year’s Solutions? Who doesn’t like a solution after all? One way to identify solutions is to focus on things that have gone well in the past, and pinpoint how you can do more of that (rather than trying to change). One of the benefits of focusing on what went well, is that you can do it every day. Instead of dwelling on what you didn’t accomplish today, identify what was successful and try to do that “one thing” again tomorrow.

    WHAT’S TO COME? 

    Throughout 2020 we launched a series of posts, each revolving around a “word of the week” to inspire solution-focused thinking and practice. We embrace those words in practice and hope that you’ve found them impactful in your conversations too. What will we write about in 2021? Here are some of our ideas that we may write more about in the months to come: practical coaching tips; building your solution-focused question library; solution-focused behavior change; and incorporating solution-focused principles in a technology-enabled world. We’d love to hear from you, and learn about what you are interested in learning regarding incorporating a solution-focused approach in  your practice!

    We hope that  2021 will be kind to all of us and that together we can learn how to help people with diabetes live their best life!

    We welcome anyone interested in our approach to Subscribe to our blog and we’ll email you when a new post is published!

    If you are a health care professional and interested in learning more about our solution-focused practice and approach, when you subscribe to our blog, we’ll send you in return a FREE resource of 10 Solution-Focused Questions to start a solution-focused discussion with your clients. 

  • Fresh Views

    ACCEPTANCE: Today’s word to jump-start solution-focused practice

    Half Dome, Yosemite National Park, California

    “Acceptance means to be in the embrace of what is without resistance. True acceptance is one of the most powerful and life-changing practices you can choose for your life journey.” ~Kirra Sherman 

    In our last blog we asked… 

    How can we draw attention to words that are powerful, impactful and transformative. More importantly, how can we build a new vocabulary in healthcare so these words easily flow into conversations between diabetes care and education specialists and their clients?

    Join us today as we launch into a series of posts that will focus on words to inspire solution-focused thinking and practice…words which we embrace in practice and believe you will find them impactful in your conversations too. Each post will introduce a new word to weave into your conversations when talking about diabetes or life in general. (Think of this as similar to Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary “Word of the Day”.)

    Today’s word is Acceptance

    We’re referring here to self-acceptance, as well as acceptance by the healthcare team in recognizing that people respond to change differently. We chose this as the first word because we believe it is foundational to solution-focused thinking. It underlies everything else. 

    Accepting oneself can be hard! 

    Being realistic about personal strengths and challenges is often easier said than done. For instance, we both love the outdoors and hiking, especially to take in a beautiful fresh view. However, with the ticking by of the years and impact of a couple injuries, we find we can’t quite embrace all of the things we used to do……like hiking up to mountain tops! Yes, that’s a bit of a bummer. We will never climb Half Dome in Yosemite National Park, pictured above! Yet, we’ve come to eventually accept that, and focus now on what we can do and find joy and happiness in that. So, we take flat hikes instead of climbing, we take a cable car ride to the top of the mountain, and we simply enjoy the beauty of it. 

    Here we are enjoying a beautiful view at Urquhart Castle, Inverness, Scotland.

    Striving to be honest with ourselves and accept who we are, our abilities, and acknowledge when we’ve reached our limits is the goal. Without acceptance it’s impossible to move forward.

    Acceptance is critical when living with a chronic condition like diabetes. 

    People need to feel safe when engaging with their care team to acknowledge what they can do, along with what is challenging for them. Diabetes care and education specialists on the other hand, need to support those that live with diabetes as they learn to accept changes and new challenges in dealing with diabetes.And, practice acceptance understanding that people react to challenges differently. It’s critical to accept the person in front of you as they are, without judgement.

    A solution-focused challenge

    So our first challenge to you is to build your capacity for acceptance. Bring this word front and center in each encounter. Develop acceptance as a personal strength and help cultivate it in others. 

    Here are 5 solution-focused questions you can incorporate to focus on building acceptance:

    1. Could  you tell me about your strengths and qualities you are happy about?
    2. What is one thing you have come to accept in your life that took some time to process?
    3. How did you feel when you were finally able to accept that challenging situation?
    4. How could you use those experiences and feelings to move you forward to accept a new challenge now?
    5. How can I help you come to realize acceptance in your life?

    We hope you will enjoy this new series. Please share with colleagues and students and encourage others in keeping acceptance top of mind in interactions. 

    We welcome anyone interested in our approach to Subscribe to our blog and we’ll email you when a new post is published!

    If you are a health care professional and interested in learning more about our solution-focused practice and approach, when you subscribe to our blog, we’ll send you in return a FREE resource of 10 Solution-Focused Questions to start a solution-focused discussion with your clients. 

    Follow us on Twitter and Instagram @AFreshPOVforYou