We guide healthcare professionals in a solution-focused approach so clients can embrace possibilities, opportunities, and a fresh vision for the future.
Our daily notebook that reminds us of our priorities
Today we’re sharing with you the cover of a notebook we both keep on our desks to capture ideas and thoughts, and also keep us grounded as to what’s important in life. This week Deb is embracing the last four …Relax more. Worry Less. Play more. Work Less. It’s Spring Break time and she is taking a break with family (and undoubtedly will have photos of some great views to share when she returns!). Incidentally, “Play More. Work Less” was Tami’s New Year’s Solution in 2017, long before owning this journal! (see more about New Year’s Solutions in place of New Year’s resolutions here).
If you have read a few of our blogs, you know that our approach is future-focused, goal-directed, with focus on solutions, rather than on problems. Today we want to share with you 10 solution focused questions that you may ask yourself when faced with a challenging situation. Or, use with clients if you are a healthcare practitioner.
10 Solution Focused Questions
What is different or going differently?
What’s going better?
Think about the positive moments surrounding the situation. Suppose those positive moments were to last longer. What difference would that make for you?
Suppose the positive moments were to last longer. What conclusions could you draw from that?
What do you see as a next step?
In your opinion, what would be a very small step forward?
How great is the chance that will work out?
What might be the next sign of progress or your next step?
What will you be doing differently then?
Who in your life will be the first to notice that?
The assumption of a solution focused approach is that individuals have some knowledge of what would make their life better and that everyone who seeks help already possesses at least the minimal skills necessary to create solutions.
If you incorporate these questions or other tools we’ve shared we’d love to hear from you. If you’re a clinician, are these techniques helping you to build a therapeutic alliance with your clients? If you’re a person living with diabetes, does this approach resonate with you and your needs as you manage your diabetes?
We look forward to sharing some new fresh views with you soon!
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From our off the beaten path adventure to Ireland’s rugged West Coast
Life throws challenges and every challenge comes with rainbows and lights to conquer it. – Amit Ray
With St. Patrick’s Day a few days away, memories of a trip we took to Ireland 4 years ago come flooding back into our minds. We and our husbands, along with two other couples, each of us from a different part of the US, convened for what became a trip of a lifetime.
While the trip began in Dublin, the real adventure started when we got off the beaten path. When we got away from touristy spots, outside our comfort zone, and took a cross country road trip to the Western rugged coast of Ireland. The picture you see above with the rainbow was taken from the back yard as we were “imprinting” and savoring our last view at the end of the trip. This trip truly turned out to be our proverbial pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. On this journey not only did we see magnificent castles, abbeys, history galore, sheep galore, glorious green like we’ve never seen, and breathtaking views, we laughed A LOT. We strengthened friendships, we made new lifelong friends in Ireland, but most importantly we learned that when you go off the beaten path (so to speak), good things can happen. You get a different view. You gain a different perspective. You get a different experience. (And yes these experiences are in our gratitude journals and brought us great joy! If you’ve been reading our blogs you’ll know how we embrace expressing gratitude and finding joy in life).
The majesty of the Cliffs of Moher, County Clare, Ireland
Reflecting and bringing these experiences back to our practices leads us to ask: What if you went off the beaten path so to speak, and rather than focusing on the things in life when managing diabetes that are NOT going the way you want, instead, focus on the things that ARE going well? In our experience, so often we see that healthcare professionals and those living with diabetes alike, fixate on things that are not as desired – whether its an out of range blood glucose, a high A1C, or frequent hypoglycemia. That can leave you burnt out, and frankly beat down. What if instead you get a whole different experience by taking the road less traveled? Focusing on what you are doing well and how you can achieve or do that more.
This next week we challenge you (whether you live with diabetes or not) to identify at least 1 thing that’s gone well. Is it possible to repeat what you did to lead to more “positive” experiences and days?
In closing, returning to the our Irish adventure. The four couples deeply bonded on this trip. We valued the time spent together. It made us realize we wanted to spend more time together over similar shared experiences. So, we are in fact planning another “off the beaten path” adventure across the South of France this summer. Adventuring through life experiences worked for us. It brings us joy. So we are going to do it again. We are sure to have some new perspectives, new learnings and beautiful views to share with you!
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Tami’s photos from the Chihuly glass sculptures exhibit at the Biltmore Estate in Asheville, NC. She did things differently by not only viewing the exhibit in the daylight, but also after dark, and got an entirely different perspective.
Doing things differently leads to something exceptional. – Anonymous
Our blog last week focused on being a human first.There was so much information in that one blog post that we decided to highlight and reinforce a few concepts today. So here we go!
The strength in a therapeutic alliance
As you may know, we strongly believe in the concept of a “therapeutic alliance” (which you may also know as the “helping alliance” or the “working alliance”). This alliance refers to the relationship between a healthcare professional and the person with diabetes by which they engage with each other to bring about beneficial change for that person with diabetes. This relationship is a most important component.
The power of language
It’s near to impossible to create those connections and build that alliance without focusing on language. Language and word choice is one of the most powerful choices we have. Words can demonstrate respect, empowerment and support or words can shame and blame. Respecting the expertise and experience of the person living with diabetes is essential to develop a strong therapeutic alliance.
Focusing on solutions, not problems
You also probably know that we are using solutions focused brief therapy (SFBT) and coaching in our work. SFBT is a questioning approach with conversation focusing on the client’s vision and how he/she identifies potential solutions. The questions asked during the interaction focus on a desired future state, and on what is already working well for that individual in the present. We acknowledge that the client has all the skills necessary to achieve their goals. As we mentioned last week, our goal, through incorporating principles of SFBT and coaching in diabetes care and education, is to change the conversation, the interaction and the experience of the diabetes community to improve health.
10 questions practitioners can use to build a therapeutic alliance
If you are a healthcare practitioner, we want to share 10 questions that you might find useful when engaging in discussions with patients or clients to acknowledge and build the therapeutic alliance. These questions reinforce the human side of both parties. They demonstrate that you care about the person sitting with you and that the relationship between you is important. Moreso, the word choices and body language during the interaction can go a long way towards creating a relationship of mutual respect.
Thank you for coming in. Tell me what’s been going on. What can I help you with today?
What do you wish to achieve or learn by the end of this session so that you can say you’re glad that you were here?
What is the best way for me to work with you? (For example, do you prefer talking on the phone or text messages?)
So that I can learn more about you, what do you consider your assets and strengths?
Is there anything else you’d like to share that I should know?
When you are at your best, what does that look like? How is that different from the way things are now?
How can you do more of what is making things go well?
If we created a plan, what would you consider a start to your being on the right track? And what else?
What can you take from this session that can help you in the coming weeks?
What will you be doing differently after this visit?
Here are 3 additional questions that can be used to glean insight and feedback on the interaction:
What feedback would you like to give me about today’s session?
On a scale of 0-10, to what extent did you feel heard, understood, and respected during this session? 0 being you did not feel heard, understood or respected at all.
On a scale of 0-10, to what extent did we talk about and work on the things that are important to you during this session? 0 being not at all.
If you try incorporating some of these questions, we’d love to hear from you about your experiences and if you felt differently during your client visits. We leave you with 3 things to consider:
Do you feel more present and “conscious” during the visit?
Do you feel like a “human” first and a practitioner second?
Do you notice that your clients are achieving their goals, and most importantly, are they feeling more confident in their ability to live well while managing their diabetes?
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Tami and Deb enjoying fresh views in Chicago, finding freedom and joy in life. T
Of course different people fulfill different functions in this world. It cannot be otherwise. As far as intellectual or physical abilities are concerned – knowledge, skills, talents, and energy levels – human beings differ widely. What really matters is not what function you fulfill in this world, but whether you identify with your function to such an extent that it takes you over and becomes a role that you play. When you play roles, you are unconscious.“ – Eckhart Tolle
Deb’s been listening to an Oprah’s Book Club book on Audible, Eckhart Tolle A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose. While Deb has found the book deep, and a challenging “read”, she’s found that it creates an opportunity to take an introspective look at the way we engage in the world. Tolle believes everyone can find “the freedom and joy of life” if they live in the present moment.
Deb has also been listening to Oprah’s weekly Super Soul Conversations Podcast to review each chapter of the book, typically while taking her daily walk (and it’s helping a lot to understand and internalize the concepts). During a recent podcast there was discussion between Oprah and Tolle about roles people play and how roles inhibit thinking. In applying some of Tolle’s principles to our mission and vision here @AFreshPOVforYOU, there was an “a ha” moment for Deb around how the #languagematters movement in healthcare needs to expand to include not just the words we use, but also how we implement person first language. (check out our November blog on why language matters here) To really put the person (not the “patient”) first, there needs to be a “person” on both sides of the interaction for true person centered care.
One section of Oprah’s weekly podcast addressed healthcare and how when a healthcare professional “plays the role of healthcare professional”, he or she may become “unconscious” of the fact he or she is a human person while embracing their “healthcare role”. And, that the “patient” across from them is also a person. Something vital is then missing. And as a result, the person (“patient) may end up feeling disconnected and dismissed.
The discussion brought to mind a recent #DSMA Twitter chat that @AFreshPOVforYou joined a couple of weeks ago. One question asked during the chat was: “How can healthcare practitioners facilitate more empowering or effective communication with patients or vise versa?” One enlightened participant, the incredible behavioral and data scientist Dr. Chandra Osborn replied, “Be a human first – a practitioner second.”
Her reply really struck a chord, and aligns with the closing words in Tolle’s quote above, “When you play roles, you are unconscious.“ Let’s repeat that…..”When you play roles, you are unconscious”. How can there be empowering or effective communication if people are not “present” and if they are “unconscious”?
Along those lines, We @AFreshPOVforYOU have experienced this first hand.
Deb’s experience…
Deb recalls a visit with her daughter to the pediatrician where they never once made eye contact. The doctor typed on the computer the whole time, asking impersonal questions and fulfilling her role. They did not feel like they were part of the conversation.
Tami’s experience…
Tami remembers a similar scenario while sitting alongside her mom at hospital discharge following her mom’s knee surgery. The healthcare team was talking all “around” both of them, talking to each other, asking questions, giving a multitude of instructions, rarely looking at them or expressing interest in their point of view or concerns. They did not feel like they were part of the conversation either.
We’ve heard many similar stories from people with diabetes – how at times the relationship with their healthcare provider was not ideal. Some have stated they cancelled an appointment because they didn’t want to be scolded for an A1C value that was higher than expected. Or because their weight was up a few pounds.
In traditional healthcare people with diabetes are expected to play the role of patient and clinicians play the role of doctor, nurse, dietitian etc. Yet this type of engagement does not promote healthy communications and relationships. As Tolle recounts, “Authentic human interactions become impossible when you lose yourself in a role.”
We’ve experienced being on both sides of this equation. As diabetes educators, we are always striving to improve, but we are not perfect. We’ve made our share of mistakes, but we’ve grown and learned from them. Deb recalls one client she saw years ago that was very frustrated with her because she was following the “assigned content” for the appointment per the prescribed healthcare provider orders, and at the end of the visit the client said, “we didn’t have time for any of my questions!” That meeting really left an impact on her, she was playing the “role” of a diabetes educator and she never made that mistake again. Fast forward to a more recent experience when she received a call from a healthcare provider who referred his patient to her. The doctor said, “I’m not quite sure what you did, but Mr. Jones is never satisfied with anything or anyone, but he could not stop talking about how his appointment with you was the best diabetes visit he’s ever had.” You know what she did? She started by asking him about his family and recent vacation, and then asked what was going well with his diabetes management? She was being a human first and he was treated like a person.
If you follow our blog, you know that we are advocates of solution focused therapy. In the context of solution focused therapy, the client/person with diabetes is viewed as the expert and the most important element is the “therapeutic alliance” between the client and the practitioner. The relationship is the key to being able to work together. And to build a relationship it requires being present, being conscious of one’s own behaviors, use of language, and body language which all tell a story. We believe it’s critical to enter healthcare exchanges as a human first- not playing a role – with each party recognizing their part in the conversation/interaction as valuable.
Our goal, through incorporating principles of solutions focused therapy and coaching in diabetes care and education, is to change the conversation, the interaction and the experience of the diabetes community to improve health. As Eckhart Tolle says, we need to “become conscious of being conscious.” We need to work as a team, be present in all of our interactions and most of all be human.
In closing, we leave you with a few thoughts on what you can do when you engage in a healthcare interaction.
If you are a healthcare provider:
Be human first
Check your ego at the door
Appreciate that the person in front of you is as an expert on their condition
Listen carefully before speaking
When possible, sit on the same side of the table
Understand the burden associated with living with a chronic condition
If you are a person living with a chronic condition:
Be human first
Actively participate in your medical appointments and your self-management to the best of your ability
Work in partnership with your care team
Be honest about your capabilities
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When life gets crazy, as it often does for us, a strategy that we @AFreshPOVforYOU find particularly useful is taking a pause or break to help clear our minds and gain a fresh perspective. It could be a half hour, an afternoon, a day, or a week. Tami has found that when her mind is jumbled or she’s trying to work out a problem, taking a walk allows her to think, her creative juices to flow, and to gain a fresh perspective. (And sometimes even happen upon a stunning sunset view like the one above captured on a recent walk). Deb enjoys sitting outside in her backyard, enjoying the view of the trees, flowers and clear water in the pool. Even getting away from our desks and out of the office at lunch brings clarity and new thinking. We’ve found when we’re hit with “writer’s block”, just putting the project away for a day or two allows us to return with a clearer mind, new ideas and new perspective. Clients we’ve worked with have shared a variety of things they do to take a pause – from taking a long run, reading a pleasure book, mowing the yard, or simply sitting and being present in the moment, Taking that pause can change your perspective….much like “turning turtle” can. You can read more about “turning turtle” in our January 30, 2019 blog.
Have you tried stepping away for a bit when you’re in the midst of a challenge? Maybe you’re struggling with insurance benefits and getting your medication prescription filled, or maybe a co-worker questioned the food you were eating at lunch. (we know that never happens!) Taking a pause may sound counterproductive, but actually it’s not. As you step away, spend a moment acknowledging all the hard work you have done. Remind yourself what you’ve accomplished or what is going well, even though it may feel like the world is swirling around you.
The practice of using solutions focused brief therapy (SFBT) encourages the exercise of asking questions when trying to identify solutions. A key premise of SFBT is that the individual is the only person who can understand his or her own needs, strengths and capabilities. The practitioner can facilitate by asking questions. One opportunity to incorporate the practice of asking questions is during these moments when you need to pause and step away.
Here are 3 questions to consider to help guide your thinking and help gain perspective:
Compliment yourself on your current efforts. What would you say to yourself?
What good intentions did you have when you started out today?
What is the most important quality you have and use when you are under stress or pressure and how can you leverage that now?
Asking yourself these questions when your mind is calm, and you are not distracted can help remind you of the resources you have within you and re-focus on your strengths.
We often find that the more challenging the season in life, the more often we need to pause. It’s an important part of self-care. Sometimes just stepping away from a situation for awhile helps to bring a fresh perspective.
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Over the past few months through this blog we’ve shared some thoughts, insights and innovative approaches around living well with diabetes and creating possibilities, opportunities, and a vision for the future. Through several projects we’ve been working on we became familiar with the like-minded work of Riva Greenberg and Boudewijn Bertsch and their Flourishing Approach to living well with diabetes. So, we connected and shared ideas. We thought our readers would be interested in Riva’s and Boudewijn’s Flourishing Approach, and they were gracious enough to share their time and thoughts with us.
Riva Greenberg and Boudewijn Bertsch. Photo credit: Mathias Loevgreen Bojesen
1. Tell us about the core principles of the Flourishing Approach to living with diabetes, and how it differs from the traditional Healthy Coping approach.
Riva (and Boudewijn): I find it interesting that we call the conventional approach to diabetes management, “Healthy Coping.” That’s truly a mixed metaphor. For people with diabetes, coping does not translate positively. Their association with coping is a sense of just getting by or struggle.
The Flourishing Approach that we designed and have shared with thousands of health professionals around the world, is a paradigm shift and a new world-view, which I will explain.
Our conventional approach takes a machine-view of the body and, while most health professionals don’t realize it, causes us to see and treat people like machines. The approach grew out of acute care, however in acute care, you can repair, heal or cure someone. Here machine values make sense.
Modern medicine adopted the values of the Industrial Revolution: accuracy, precision, perfection, standards, linearity, cause and effect. These remarkably advanced medical tests and technologies. Unfortunately, they do not foster what people need to live well with a chronic illness – adaptability, growth, healing and developing resilience. Nor do they inspire the tissue of self-care – connection, confidence and commitment.
Seeing people with diabetes as machines we see defects. In contrast, the Flourishing Approach (FA) sees a person with diabetes as a biological organism. As such we see they are now in a new state, redesigned, not disabled but differently-abled. From this orientation, the Approach brings no judgment and the direction, rather than fixing, is to promote growth and wellness as living organisms are designed for.
The Flourishing Approach also, unlike the conventional approach, sees diabetes as a complex condition and the person with it operating in a complex world. As such, you cannot apply cause and effect thinking. We cannot say, “Do this and that will happen,” there is too much complexity.
Nor can we apply accuracy and precision to blood sugar management. Telling a person with diabetes that they can “control” their blood sugar is not only untrue, it sets them up for failure. Instead, we need to nurture and equip individuals to help influence their blood sugar and respond appropriately.
The core principles in the Flourishing Approach are based on human sciences, neuroscience, biology and social sciences and according insights like we need to feel safe to function at our best. “Best practices,” culled from the masses pale against individualized “emergent practices.” The FA helps people explore their own solutions; we don’t impose standards based on averages.
As an orientation the Flourishing Approach: 1) is relationship-centered, both practitioner and person with diabetes bring their mutual strengths, expertise and ideas together, 2) explores the patient’s context 3) uses open conversations where solutions emerge 4) is positively focused, looking for what’s working and 5) aims to achieve what’s wanted, better health, not what’s to be avoided, complications.
2. The work we @AFreshPOVforYou are doing is centered around the solutions focused brief therapy approach. How does that align with the Flourishing approach?
Riva (and Boudewijn): The Flourishing Approach is based on several sciences that explain how we operate as a biological organism. Solution focused brief therapy (SFBT) is one of these theories. But it’s important to understand the FA is not just a set of tools, but a different paradigm. One can use SFBT within the conventional treatment approach. For instance, we can ask patients positively-focused questions yet still assume the mantle of the expert who has the answers.
The FA is based on Systems and Complexity theory, that we operate within systems – home, family, work, community, culture, country, and that diabetes is complex and medical sociologist Aaron Antonovsky’s ‘Sense of Coherence’ and Dr. Stephen Porges’ Polyvagal Theory.
Porges identified a third autonomic nervous system (ANS) in addition to the sympathetic and parasympathetic. He calls it the social engagement system. In this state we are most open, flexible, creative, adaptive and push forward confidently into the world. But to be in this state we must feel safe. So, I ask practitioners when I present at conferences, “What do you do to help your patients feel safe?” They have never thought of it before. The FA being relationship-centered, not patient-centered, heightens safety.
3. How can readers learn more about the Flourishing Approach?
4. Would you share an impactful story/experience surrounding the Flourishing Approach.
Riva (and Boudewijn): In January 2014 we spent three weeks sharing the Approach with the medical staff of Jnana Sanjeevini Diabetes Center in Bangalore, India. One day a dietitian came up to me. She told me she’d followed our teaching and asked her patient what he was doing well and what he’d like to try next. The whole visit, she said, was light and filled with laughter and he left excited. Normally, she said, she’d try to push him to do what she thought he should, he’d leave downhearted and nothing would change.
We also have a diabetes nurse from Steno Diabetes Center in Denmark, where I’ve done a lot of training, tell me her patients are changing behaviors more easily, and she is happier in her work using the Approach.
5. What one thing would you like readers to know?
Riva (and Boudewijn): I don’t discount today’s conventional approach. It works for some. My aim is to expand health professionals’ repertoire and people with diabetes’ possibilities by using a human-, not machine-, based approach.
We’ve had numerous innovations in diabetes medicine, tools and technologies, in software and hardware. Yet no innovation in treating patients. The Flourishing Approach is an innovation in this essential aspect we all but ignore, heart-ware.
I’ve presented the Flourishing Approach at diabetes conferences around the world – the ADA and AADE annual conferences, the Charles H. Best Diabetes Center in Canada, and at conferences in Israel, Sydney and Singapore. I have also presented the Flourishing idea to device and pharma companies. This December I’ll be presenting it at the International Diabetes Federation World Congress in Busan, Korea.
If anyone is interested in a presentation on the Flourishing Approach and/or workshop, where I teach a few tools from the Approach, they can contact me at riva@diabetesbydesign.com.
Thank you Riva and Boudewijn for your encouraging solutions focused approach to flourishing with diabetes!
Dubai, UAE following the IDF Congress, December 2017
Last week’s blog post focused on developing a practice of gratitude – being grateful for the little, everyday things (and big things too), especially when challenged with the burden of a chronic condition that may sometimes make finding joy in life a struggle.
Along those lines, this week we are continuing our discussion on gratitude from a slightly different view……. when things are “turning turtle”, or in other words turned upside down! What are we talking about? You may have seen the recently released movie Mary Poppins Returns. One of the movie’s songs beautifully sung by Meryl Streep is called “Turning Turtle”. If you haven’t heard it, click on the link and check it out!
The song opens with these lyrics:
Turning turtle? What exactly does that mean?
It means my whole world goes flippity flop like a turtle on its back.
And I don’t know my up from my down, my east from my west,
My topsy from my bottomsy…
By definition, “turning turtle” is to capsize or turn upside down. (For example, during the accident, the car turned turtle). A turtle on its back is helpless and disoriented. It can’t move. It isn’t safe or protected by its shell. It may seem stuck, without options or an evident solution to being trapped on it’s back. Or are there options? The song lyrics go on to say:
…It’s good to get a different point of view
You see, when the world turns upside down,
The best thing is turn right along with it.
When the world turns upside down so to speak, an opportunity is presented to gain a fresh point of view. And when a situation may seem challenging, being able to bring forth opportunities for gratitude may need that twist – that upside down view. This song is a great exercise in seeing the world through a different lense and creating a different point of view. And in turn, rather than focusing on the “problem”, instead focusing on “solutions” that could work (especially if similar solutions that worked in the past can be applied here). In illustration, a friend with diabetes shared this story that might help us think about the “turning turtle” concept applied to life with diabetes:
She was traveling out of the country and had recently changed insulin pumps. By mistake, she packed her old infusion sets, that worked with her old pump. When she was preparing to change her pump, site realized what had happened. Fortunately she packed enough insulin pens as back up and had those with her to use for the remainder of the trip. When the trip was over she actually felt like she had been on a vacation from her pump. She never dreamed of stopping the pump – she felt like she would be flat on her back without it, like the turtle. But, she actually found some joy and gratitude in not being attached to her pump for a week, and at the same time gained a new sense of appreciation when she returned home and was able to connect to the pump again. She was pleased with herself for being prepared. She commented that she always brings extra supplies but has never needed them before. This “problem” had a solution readily available because of her constant effort to be prepared. And her trip might have been ruined had she focused on the fact that she couldn’t wear her pump, but instead she chose to be thankful she had insulin pens available and experienced a different week of diabetes management that then gave her a little more resilience when she was ready to start the pump again.
Returning to the song…it goes on to close out:
When you change the view from where you stood
The things you view will change for good
I never thought of things that way
She never thought of things that way
Now Wednesdays are my favorite days
…I have changed. To be exact, I love the fact
The world is turning turtle, turtle, turtle
When you next find yourself in a “turning turtle” situation, we encourage you to reflect on the following:
What new point of view is in front of you to be embraced?
How can you leverage past successful solutions in this situation?
What can you acknowledge gratitude for?
And like the closing song lyrics, now Wednesdays are our favorite days too since that’s when we share a new blog post each week! Until next Wednesday!
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With the new day comes new strength and new thoughts – Eleanor Roosevelt
New Year’s Eve Fireworks
With the start of the new year, many find themselves reflecting on the past year, re-evaluating life, and pondering what “resolutions” they will set for the new year. New year’s resolutions often focus on “stopping” doing certain thingsand starting to make changes. Many resolutions revolve around trying to be healthier in some way. Yet evidence shows that about 80% of people fail to stick to their New Year’s resolutions longer than six weeks. That means by the time the Valentine’s Day rolls around, many have abandoned their desire to change. Often resolutions are attempts to find ways to solve problems.
What if, instead of making New Year’s Resolutions which require change and “fixing” problems (and change is hard!) – you focus instead on making New Year’s Solutions?
Who doesn’t like a solution after all? One way to identify solutions is to focus on things that have gone well in the past, and pinpoint how you can do more of that (rather than trying to change).
As you reflect on the past year, here are 5 questions to ask yourself and guide your thinking:
What went well for you in 2018?
What did you feel happy about?
What behaviors helped you feel successful and were doable?
How can you do more that?
Instead of thinking about “problems”, how can you reframe your thinking into positive “opportunities” and solutions? (Reframing a situation, idea, or belief can bring a fresh perspective. You can read more about this in our January 2, 2019 post.)
Here’s an example from Deb…
I am a fan of Starbucks Mochas. As 2018 opened, I was getting a Mocha most every day. I also like Starbucks lattes. And the latte has fewer calories. So I started ordering the latte more often. I also discovered I didn’t really need a grande but was satisfied with a tall, so I now order a tall most days. When you add up the calories over the course of a year, that’s a significant savings! (Now on some days when I really need a pick me up I may decide on a Mocha or splurge on a grande, but it’s no longer the routine). I leveraged something that was going well, and did more of it. It was doable. I closed out 2018 happy about this solution.
Here’s an example from Tami…
One of my favorite ways to get physical activity is to walk in the neighborhood after a long work day. I especially like this in the fall and during the holidays with all of the decorations and twinkling lights providing a fresh view to take in while meeting my step goal and unwinding from the day. The past few months I’ve battled a foot injury that has made walking my usual routes impossible some days. Rather than focusing on the “I can’t”, I’ve turned and focused on what I CAN do. By reframing my thoughts, I find myself thinking, “ I can do this. I am not lazy. I am rebuilding my endurance step by step. I am grateful I am able to do half of my usual walk, it’s better than none.” And I’m really grateful for the days I’ve been able to complete my routine route! I’ve focused on keeping the habit going. Focusing on what I CAN DO and what is going well, rather than fixating on what I can’t accomplish. By reframing the situation, my resulting emotions are feeling confident, in control, and hopeful.
So as we look with excitement to 2019, join us in making New Year’s Solutions and resolving to do more of things that we do well!
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While our focus is “fresh views”, today there is nothing “fresh” about the air in northern California or the views in the sky. The devastating Camp Fire in Paradise, CA is beyond words. We felt compelled to share our thoughts since this fire is so close to home for @DebGreenwood.
How can survivors of this fire living with diabetes or other chronic conditions even think about their next steps (never mind taking medication or counting carbohydrates)? The Apple Watch is a reminder every day that the air quality is unhealthy for all, and certainly not suitable for outdoor exercise. So we began to ponder, how can solutions focused brief therapy (SFBT) help those who find themselves in this situation and devastation to move one small step forward, and create hope and possibilities? Admittedly, this is really challenging and we’re struggling to find a way to think through this problem.
SFBT is all about asking questions and helping a person recognize their strengths. A recent blog post by Dr. Anne Bodmer Lutz, A Language of Hope: Top 10 Solution Focused Translations, helps us think about opportunities to support individuals to be future-focused when faced with challenges.
So, one question might be “Who are the most important people in your life and what do you most appreciate about them?” The answer may help one recognize that he or she has a support system around them, and that these important individuals can be a source of strength.
A second question may be “What do you know?” This question focuses on competence. For instance, for a parent of a child with diabetes living under a stressful situation, one might ask,“What do you know about your child that tells you he is going to be okay?”
Another question is the “indirect compliment” where one asks “How did you do it? Or “How did you manage to remember to take your insulin?” By recognizing what has been accomplished and past success, one can feel a sense of empowerment.
One thing learned from Dr. Anne Bodmer Lutz is that “cope” is just one letter away from “hope”.
Those of us at A Fresh POV for You are wishing everyone impacted by these California wildfires all of the possibilities and opportunities for your future.
Sometimes you just need a little bit of time for yourself to clear up your mind and see things from a new perspective. – Anonymous (Jar of Quotes)
It’s National Diabetes Month and we’re on the go raising awareness about diabetes, gaining new perspectives, and challenging those impacted by diabetes to embrace possibilities, opportunities and a fresh vision for the future!
As you may be catching on, we are all about the “view”…from striking “views” on life’s travels to embracing a positive perspective in viewing life itself, day-in and day-out. So on that note, we want to share this “view” from one stop in the November travels – looking out over Baltimore’s Inner Harbor in Baltimore, Maryland.
The top photo was snapped in the morning on the way out the door. Then below you see that same view, taken before settling in for the night. What a difference the passage of time and associated changes in lighting makes. The lighting changes what is perceived, and how. Twilight brings a whole new and beautiful perspective…the ability to see the harbor in a different way and see things that aren’t visible during the day.
Taking that thought a step further…What could be possible if you took a little time to clear your mind, and shifted your focus from the problems you’re facing living with diabetes, to instead focus on those times when things are going as desired? What if you viewed things in a different light? How can you build upon your successes?
Here’s an example for those using continuous glucose monitors (CGM) to stay in touch with blood glucose levels. When looking at trends and patterns, rather than focusing on the time blood glucose is out of range and trying to “fix” that, how about turning your focus to times you are in range, what was going on then, and trying to do more of that. What small steps can you begin to take in that direction?
Without a doubt diabetes is complex and burdensome. No one wants or needs anything NEW to do. But what if you focus on the things that are already working for you and try to do those more often?
That’s the challenge we leave you with today. Time may bring a new perspective.
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